Somethingweirdisgoingon

Idontknowhowtoexplainit.

But the way you look at me is different. the way you puch me is different. the time you take out of your day to say "beonka sucks---helluh much!" is weird. different at best. Yeah I know. I've wished on stars, I've made silly little wishes on 11:11. But some of those things never came true for me...and it's like...whyr you doing this to me..

Iknowyoudontlikeme.

Or anything of the sorts.at first it was weird. How we started out as brother and sister...then all the sudden we had a child.[which you threw in the water.(it was a rag)] then we went back to being "friends" who flirt alot i guess. And its funn how everyone is saying that we dated..or are going to date...and sometimes i dont see it...other times i do.. I just wish we could get on level ground here...so im not floating while you hold my string...

Ithinkitsreallyfunnyhow

Hegotoffended

If he didnt like her in the first place..why would he let her put his d__k in her mouth. That doesnt make sence. Yeah I know it was wrong of me to call him out on it. But he knows that everyone in this SCHOOl doesnt like him.

Please,letmeexplain:

This is the boy who:

• wanks off to dead bodies.
• Says, "oh its a booty call" [its his mom]
• decides to poke fun at the girls who turn him down.
• expects life to fall into his hands just because he thinks he can draw.
• Has the lamest insults EVER. I mean god. "are you gunnuh ugly everyone to death." and "you have a fat ass"

That shits just plain `ol fuhken rediculous.

Iknowishouldbenicetohim

But i dont think i can. I dont think i want to. HE'S SO annoying. it makes me wunna drag him somewhere and leave him there. Man.

Im tired as buck.

Soithinkitsabouttime

Formetoendthis

I dont knopw why i thought that we could ever be just friends. First off, Your so much younger than i. You still have life to live.I dont have much left. I dont know. I cant possibly imagine my life without you. I wont as a matter of fact. we'll just slowly drift apart. I love you. With all my heart. I want to tell you i love you everyday. I want to tell you that I'd die for you. I want to tell you that no matter what, You'll always have my heart. Of my god. you have no idea.

How much i think about you. How big i smile when i get a txt from you. How i visit your page just to see your smile. Oh Gavin, if you only understood. Sometimes you do. and others you dont.

If i die tonight, I'll hear your voice. When i sleep tonight, At 11:11 I'll make a wish for you.

I'm so in love, And i realize i can never have you to myself. So i have to take ME away from YOU. even though it'll take me a few months...

I wunna cry. I wunna curl up and forget that i ever started talking to you. I want you to forget about me. BUt at the same time. I want you to say you love me every chance you get.

Oh god you dont even know. I cant type fast enough to explain the way you make me feel.

Godimpatetic.

idontknowwhyifightforyouthisway.

I'vetriedtoseetheworldlikeyoudo.

Personally....Its impossible. I cant look at a beach and think "oh my god, that's a beautiful sun set." instead I see the falling sunlight brighten the objects scattered on the sand. and it makes me sick to my stomach.

Iwishicouldseelikeyou

I wish i could see the world for what it is and what it has to offer me..but i cant no matter how hard i try. I cant see love. it's not real. i cant see beauty.its covered in soggy condoms and covered with a permanent concrete blanket,

Youmakemejelous

hah. I cant even begin to explain it.

firsttimeever

INeversaiditwouldbesimple.

you never said it would be simple. Everything I've ever gone through.i blame it all on you. this is your fault. I don't know what i was thinking..Putting my trust in someone like you...Loving your smile. Loving the fact that you were mine to hold and i was yours forever. I didn't know that you would take my heart, lay it on a cold table and poke at it with a burnt needle. Taking all my breath away with your quick kisses. Leaving me speechless at the things you said, "Every time my heart beats, it beats your name. You never told me that you would leave me dreaming under my ceiling about the days that would never come. i dont know what i was thinking. The way you said my name. the way youd hold my hand when we stayed out late. The way your voice souned on the phone..in person.

Yeah, I guess i was fuhken stupid for ever thinking. For ever believing that I could be yours forever. You never told me that SHE would take you away from me for forever. You never told me how you would make me cry for months in the bathroom. Well fuck. I never thought that i would still love you. Even after the things you said, the things you've done. I made you into something i cant ever be held accountable for. I cant believe i gave you a shread of confidence to hold close to your chest, scratch untill you reach your hear and keep it there. that is....untill SHE blew you up six sizes to big.Untill SHE made you something your not. a dick pretty much. You USE to care...and now, you think you have no one but her because you've thrown everyone close to you away. your best friend started smoking[ who knows what became of him]

You make me hate you. YOU wanted this "friendship" to work. Hah. please. Spare me the thought of ever having to fall in love with that smile, that voice. Dear lord. Help me from wanting to hold you. To cry--and beg for you to take me back. It seems your quite taken with HER and i guess you should be. Because I could never have done for you the things she could.

I couldnt have ever kissed you the way she did. I couldnt have ever pressed my body against you like she did. I couldnt ever have lied to you like she did. i couldnt ever have used you like she did. i could ever have told you the things she did out of love.

Because I loved you for what you were. A sweet heart, who didnt know any better. A bright eyed boy who had more to look forward to than just sex and giving your heart away to someone who doesnt want it. But you never listen to me....so please tell me..

Whyevenbother?